November 24th, 2009

Jones Party Hat


It's amazing. Two sentences of badfic sent me scurrying for Livejournal.

It was a simple thing, really. I was on TVTropes, looking up Nightmare Fuel so that I could stay awake through Chemistry (I have it in 3 hours and twenty minutes) (Also, if you have time, find the Nightmare Fuel for Disneyland. There is some CREEPY stuff there. Read it in a dark room, surrounded by dark characters on light posters. Vincent Valentine has rarely scared me more. Ditto Gorillaz and Tifa). Well, after that, I started wondering, "I wonder if there's any Hamlet Nightmare Fuel" so I went and had a look. There isn't any, but that didn't stop me from reading the rest of the article and I came across the term, "The Ophelia."

It reminded me of a fic I had read ages ago. It was an "Abuse me, Weiss!"Nero with an "Abuse is love!"Weiss. I wanted to see if I could get through it. I got through the first two sentences before I came crawling back here. My sleep-deprived eyes simply refuse to deal with Nero acting like this at this hour.

Yes, Nero is astoundingly tragic. Yes, he is fifty-MILLION types of sad and depressing, starting with his eyes and ending with his restraints. That does NOT make him The Woobie. Sure, Nero could be runner-up for the saddest character in all of Dirge (in the running with Shelke, Vincent and, what the hell, Weiss and Lucrecia) but that doesn't mean my baby is a wuss. He's tragic, but he has a void that will EAT YOU. OM NOM NOM.

On the subject of shoddy characterization, my Weiss is a powerful man and I love him for it. I love the fact that he gets his power STRICTLY from mako and J-cells and I love the fact that he's charismatic (read as: sexy) enough to lead an entire army against three rather powerful men. I'm also in love because he's capable of taking one for the team. However, just because my man (as much of "my man" as someone like him could ever be) is a charismatic leader, he is not a sadistic creep who BEATS NERO WITH VARIOUS IMPLEMENTS. And even if he IS a sadistic creep who beats people with various implements, he sure as hell won't take it out on NERO, his adorableadored brother who never did anything to harm his "niisan."

In short, Jesus H. Cox, guys, I haven't slept in over 20 hours, and I still know that Nero isn't a little girl. I have, however, forgotten basic math.

(PS: RC, I think I found the authoress you were telling me about. Er... I didn't read it, but I saw the summary and went, "That's the one, isn't it? Oh man..." )